


Tutor

by invawes



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M, Pining, Pining Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Tutoring
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-01
Updated: 2016-06-14
Packaged: 2018-07-11 16:18:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7060078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/invawes/pseuds/invawes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi is in denial when it comes to his feelings for Eren. The boy asks to tutor him and poor Levi suffers. Also, who invented feelings?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. i

**Author's Note:**

> I checked it twice for any mistakes but i cannot guarantee whether my not-english-native ass fucked something up. (hint: it probably did)  
> It will most likely have two more chapters, depending on my willingness to write and people's feedback (IF I GET ANY, lmao).  
> I never played Uncharted 4.
> 
> I am sorry.  
> Have fun, Ewa.

Sure, he might have been good at maths, great in fact, but it he never considered it to be worth praising. And yet, god bless trigonometry and its apparent difficulty.  Why would you praise mathematics  so much, you’d ask? You would, if you ever were the one to be tutoring your crush. Crush was a stupid word for Levi. It implied some weird, mushy feeling in your stomach; the general impression of a seventeen years old girl obsessing over a boy from her class. Which he was definitely not. His heart _did not_ skip a beat and he most certainly _did not_ fidget.  At first, it had been difficult for him to overcome the state of denial but later on, he just had to accept that he was doomed.  Still, it felt like a nightmare.  Hence, he chose not to call _this_ a crush, rather something that would eventually pass.  Hopefully. Like some sort of a disease.

The bane of his life was Eren Jaeger.  Levi was not the one to analyze people’s appearance but he had spent an embarrassing amount of time on Eren’s facebook profile, lurking and staring at his dumb selfies. Dumb selfies and even dumber eyes.  Dumb for being so horrendously beautiful. The intensity of the turquoise irises surrounding his big pupils which had made him want to stare at them forever. Not that he would ever admit it to anyone. To himself, even. To justify his stalkerish escapades, he had told himself he had been looking for someone on one of Eren’s photos. Great explanation Levi, A+, totally believable.

The disease (not crush, remember) had not hit him out of nowhere, oh no. It had been hiding back in his subconsciousness for a while, slowly coming out whenever he bumped into him, whether it was Hanji’s party or the college library. The slow realization that had been followed by the strong denial. Blame the depravity of sleep, blame the stress, blame Eren’s eyes and his stupid grin. He had tried everything: avoiding him, looking for a reason to despise him, burying himself in studying. No such luck. Fuck you, fate.  Fuck you nicely. In the end, he had to accept it, the part of denying never leaving his mind.  Perhaps it was his punishment for the sins he had committed in his previous life.  The more he had tried to suppress those feelings, the stronger they had hit, like a boomerang.

Eren, out of all people, Eren. Levi could hardly imagine himself in a relationship with any person, let alone Eren. Not to mention, the kid was probably straight. Life wasn’t a movie,  when you fall for a guy, he’s usually straight. However, Levi did not _fall._ If he had to, he liked to call it an accident slip. Levi didn’t want to label himself so he didn’t even bother with naming his sexual orientation. He’s slept with both men and women but he felt that “bisexual” term was too narrow for him. Sex, kissing, yes,  but never an actual relationship. The intimacy that came with being with someone, waking up next to them,  eating breakfast together, even goddamn farting  - it all scared the shit out of him. This was also why he had been in denial ever since _it_ started.

He and Eren were friends. Well, more like acquaintances.  Alright, they had mutual friends, Hanji and Erwin. Eren’s flatmate – Armin -  was also a close friend of Hanji’s so naturally their meeting was bound to happen since somehow (Levi still wondered how the hell this had happened) he and Hanji always spent most of their free time together. At first, he hadn’t even remembered Eren’s name but with each meeting they talked more and more.  And he was gradually becoming more screwed.  It was all those little things that Levi didn’t know he had been noticing. The way Eren’s eyebrows furrowed whenever he got annoyed with something , his passionate stare and over-excited babbling  whenever he found something interesting. His sly grin and fooling attempts at making Levi laugh. Note: successful attempts. Levi always pretended he did not find any of his jokes funny because they were bad.  And yet.

Alright, back to the mathematics.  On one rainy day, late October, Levi was sitting by his usual table, back in the corner of the library. He was struggling with his assignment not because of its difficulty per se, but his inability to focus due to the lack of sleep the previous night.  He stared blankly at his laptop’s screen, the whiteness painfully reminding him of how much he had yet to work.  He had three more days until the deadline but he had never liked procrastinating and the time pressure that usually followed it. It just made him even more stressed than he already was.  He did not need that.

His chin was resting on his hand which was going quite numb from not changing the position in the long time.  He was buried in his thoughts so he didn’t notice the person walking up to him.

“Hey Levi.”

He jumped at the voice he _did not_ like mainly because it did funny things to his heart.

“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you. “ Eren smiled sheepishly.

“It’s fine” Levi cleared his throat, trying to keep himself in check. “What’s up?”

“Umm, I need a favour but you look busy, so perhaps I’ll try another time…” he hesitated before Levi stopped him.

“I can’t focus anyway. Spill it.”

Eren rubbed the back of his head. “I’ve been having a problem lately with my maths course. The new professor explains everything in a shitty way, too fast and I can’t keep up.  Normally, I would get it but his speed and his stupid accent are driving me crazy. Anyhow, since you’re so good at maths I was wondering whether you could help and tutor me a bit…? He trailed off, looking uncertain. “Unless you don’t want to, which I totally understand.”

_No._

“Yes, I mean -  no. “ Levi  mentally slapped himself noticing Eren’s confused expression.

_Abort, mission abort._

“I mean,  I don’t mind.  I suppose I could help you out.” Fuck him and his being socially inept.

 “Thank you!”  he was grinning so hard that Levi felt like vomiting. “We could exchange numbers so we can plan when we want to meet. I don’t want to bother you any longer now. “ he was practically beaming.

And Levi was fucked.  So utterly fucked.

“S-sure.”  he took a phone which Eren was handing over to him and put his number in.  He handed it back and looked at the boy. 

“I’ll text you later. Have fun with your studying. Thanks again. “ he flashed him another smile before walking off leaving Levi dumbstruck.

_Right._

So that’s how it happened. It pretty much spoke for itself. Now Levi both hated and loved trigonometry. He had to spend time with Eren _and_ he got to spend time with Eren. If his near heart attack was any indication, then he wasn’t sure how he would react to spending a few good hours with him. He sighed and rubbed his eyes before checking time on the laptop’s screen.  He still had time to work before the library was closed.

 

***  


  
Levi was reading a book in his room when he got a text. He thought it was Hanji at first but when he saw an unknown number, he knew his was beating too fast for its own good.  He unlocked the screen and read the message.

_Hey, It’s Eren.  So about the tutoring. R u free tomorrow around 10am???_

It had been three days since their encounter in the library, so Levi started wondering whether Eren had lost his interest.  He definitely wasn’t sulking.

Tomorrow was Saturday so obviously he didn’t have any plans, especially not in the morning.

He typed  his response and within twenty seconds he found himself staring at the smiling emoji which Eren had sent him.  

 

***

 

They agreed to meet at Levi’s place. Levi knew he was getting himself into trouble since all he could think about since he had woken up was the fact that Eren Jaeger was supposed to be in his home in a few hours.  He was sweating which was abnormal because he was usually cold. He couldn’t sit in one place for longer than twenty minutes, feeling as if his insides were tied up in an uncomfortable knot. Every piece of furniture in his apartment seemed to be in a desperate need of dusting.  He was told to be a clean-freak but he liked to think that he simply had high standards. Well, high for some people, for him it was an absolute minimum. He rolled his eyes whenever someone joked about him having OCD. People just loved to throw around names of mental illnesses not knowing shit about them and calling a simple mood swing a borderline disorder. Wow, hilarious, you fuckers. 

So yeah, he might have cleaned everything twice, sue him.

Twenty minutes to 10AM., he was staring at the door, waiting for sweet death to embrace him and end his suffering. Sadly, when he heard a knock to his door he did not die but he sure as hell received heart palpitations. Given the amount of time he was about to spend with the boy, he was expecting  to end up in hospital.

Levi waited a few seconds, not wanting to make it seem like he had been waiting at the door. Right. He took a deep breath and opened it. 

“Hi. I brought snacks.” He was greeted by one of Eren’s smiles he love… didn’t mind so much.

“Hi. Okay.” Wow, A+ Levi,  eloquence at its finest.

He stepped back to invite Eren in. He felt very self-conscious about his apartment, even though he had nothing to be embarrassed by.  He inherited it after his parents’ death and lived alone which suited his introvertism.  It was small and at the same time minimalistic. He didn’t give much thought on how to decorate it after he was left to live on his own.

Eren took his shoes off and followed Levi to his living room where the older one had prepared stuff for the tutoring session.  He sat next to Levi’s chair rolling up the sleeves of a red plaid shirt he was wearing.

“Thank you so much once again. I didn’t know who else to ask” his voice was filled with gratitude.

“No problem, kiddo.” Levi walked  over to the chair he was supposed to be occupying and realized he had to face another problem.  Sitting so close to someone you found fairly attractive, if not hot (note: it didn’t have anything to do with the alleged “crush”; you could find someone beautiful and have no romantic interest in them) was one hell of a challenge. 

He could _smell_ Eren’s cologne. Regardless of the fact how creepily it sounded to him,  he would lying if he said it didn’t do anything to him. Fuck, maybe he was becoming a seventeen year old girl after all? He swore he was digging his own grave each time he leaned closer to Eren to point something out in an equation.  The smell was intoxicating, really, he couldn’t quite name it but the mix of the cologne and Eren’s own scent was very appealing. And very annoying.

The boy couldn’t sit still, it was obvious.  When Levi’s hand accidently brushed against Eren’s, the older had to suppress the ugly shiver that went through him at the skin-to-skin contact.  The worst part was listening to the boy’s bad jokes which he somehow managed to make regardless of the topic of their conversation.  Why would Levi laugh at the jokes about triangles? Good question, because he didn’t.  However, the knowing look that Eren gave him when Levi tried to hide his smile (apparently, he failed)  and the smirk left Levi’s chest fluttering. An odd feeling, really.

“I’m tired. Let’s catch a break, shall we?” Eren gave out a loud yawn ( _not cute)_. He stretched out, his plaid shirt coming up, showing a bit of his abdomen leaving a lot to Levi’s imagination. He swallowed loudly, averting his gaze at the wooden table they were currently sitting by.

“It’s been only an hour” he pointed out trying to keep himself in check.

“I knooow but maths is boring.”  He whined as he straightened, grabbing the bag which he had put on the floor.  “Are Nachos okay?” he waved at him with a pack of chips.

“Gross, but okay.”

“You don’t like it?”

“Do you like to eat grease alone?” 

“Fair enough.” Eren chuckled quietly as he looked around, not knowing what to do next.

The older man stood up and headed towards the TV. He swore, his name could be placed in a dictionary, as an example for the word “awkward”.

“Let’s watch something.” Levi suggested, turning his TV set on and plopped down on his couch. Eren sat next to him, too close for Levi’s good.

They were watching some reality show for a while, when the awkward silence started to take its toll and leave Levi nervous. Fortunately, Eren was the one to break the silence.

“You leave alone?”

“My parents are dead.”  He was used to saying that. It often took people off guard, so he wasn’t surprised by Eren’s reaction.

The boy looked at him in astonishment before opening his mouth. “O-oh, I’m  so sorry, Levi. I didn’t know.”

“It’s fine. You didn’t cause their death. You have nothing to apologise for, really.”  He rolled his eyes.

“True. But isn’t it what I was supposed to say?” he offered him a light smile, putting a handful of chips into his mouth.

“Yeah, it’s what most people do, and while I don’t doubt that some really mean what they say, I just hate hearing it for the sake of hearing it, you know?” he explained watching a figure on tv making a fool of themselves.

“’’Cause you never know whether it’s fake, right?” Eren noted.

“Precisely.” He nodded, finally turning his gaze to the boy.  He was observing him carefully.

“Can I know what happened to them?”

“Car accident. Mom died at the scene and father on his way to hospital. I was 19.”

“I truly am sorry, you know.”

Levi averted his eyes acknowledging Eren’s condolences.  “I know, don’t worry.”  He brushed an invisible speck of dust off his pants.

„What about your parents?” he inquired. A small talk couldn’t hurt.

“My father’s gone, never met him. My mom’s name is Carla and she is a kindergarten teacher back in Chicago.” He paused to clear his throat and continued. “She raised me on her own, when I was born, she was barely 22. Worked her ass off to keep me happy and not let me feel when we were short of money.”

 Levi was wrong, a small talk could hurt because  of the way Eren talked about his mother. His face was brightened, eyes lit up, making dimples in his cheeks even more adorable.  It was clear, he loved her very much, warm tone alone was capable of leaving Levi with a lump in his throat. The worse thing was that they were maintaining eye contact this whole time and Levi could practically feel the radiating fondness in his voice in which Eren was describing his mother.

“You’re mama’s boy, aren’t you?” he teased, his mouth twitching.

“Shut up.”  Eren blushed, looking down at his knees making Levi wonder how the hell he could find the pink covering Eren’s cheeks so gorgeous.

But he did, nevertheless.

“I am, though.” He admitted, chuckling lightly.

“You want something to drink?” Levi stood up abruptly, his mouth feeling oddly dry.

“Water’s fine.”

Levi made his way to the kitchen, trying to gather his thoughts. So far, it wasn’t that bad. He did enjoy Eren’s company, even if it was just in a friendly manner.  It’s not like he was counting on something else. He tried not to linger on this weird thought.  He wasn’t counting on anything. The only counting he did, was in the math problems he tried to explain to Eren. He cursed himself mentally, Eren was so deep in his mind he started  involuntarily making bad jokes himself. Still, despise a few mishaps that might have ended with him having a cardiac arrest, he was doing quite well.

“Oh, you have Playstation.  I just noticed.” He heard Eren mutter from the living room.

“You wanna play?”  he suggested adding ice to their mugs.

A loud shriek almost caused him to spill water. He grimaced to himself.

“What now?”

“Dude, you have Uncharted 4!”

“Glad you can read.” The sarcasm wasn’t really necessary but Levi found out it was a perfect defense mechanism preventing him from doing something stupid like… Like anything he did not want to think about right now.

“We are so playing it!!”

And who was Levi to say “no” to that?

It turned out that Eren liked to swear a lot while playing video games. It sounded sort of funny because one second he was muttering every possible combination of the f-word under his breath and the other he was full-on screaming making Levi think about his neighbour’s sanity. And his own, since he found it oddly pleasing.

“Eren, do you have any meds that perhaps you forgot to take?” he asked amused, saving Eren’s character before certain death.

“Thanks. And, no, I don’t.  Shut up.” He scoffed, killing his enemy off.

“Sure.” Levi smirked propping himself up.

They were playing for two hours total before Levi noticed time.

“Eren.”

“What?” he grumbled, obviously occupied with his character.

“You do realise I am supposed to be tutoring you, right?”

“Oh, right, shit, sorry.” He grimaced putting away his pad.  “I just wanted to play it badly, and you just happened to have it, sorry. Let’s..” he started to babble before Levi stopped him.

He waved a hand at him dismissively.

“Don’t sweat it. Let’s finish this thing off.”

And they did. Levi decided that each minute spent with Eren, he was getting more and more comfortable. He really enjoyed the boy’s company, even talking about stuff that didn’t really matter. A strange thought occurred to him when he was seeing Eren off to his door. He kind of wanted to hang out again. Low-key spend more time with him. Or high-key.  He was on the verge of switching off his brain and asking him to do so when Eren answered his hidden wishes himself.

“Would you mind doing another session with me?” Eren was smiling sheepishly, playing with the strings of his bag. “There’s still some stuff that I don’t understand.” He added. The hopeful look he gave Levi made him want to agree to anything the boy would ask.  The pink on his cheeks seemed to have a strange effect on Levi.

He pretended to ponder on the answer, as if he couldn’t decide.

“Sure. Why not?”

Another nail added to his grave.  Amazing.

The nail was worth the smile he had received, though.

***

“I was talking to this girl from IT course, the one that I had told you about.  Her name was Sarah, I guess.” Hanji paused for a second, reassuring themselves. “Yes, Sarah. So, we’re talking about the professor what shit he had pulled out earlier and suddenly she goes  ‘classic ESFP’”  they exclaimed, grabbing Levi’s shoulder and shaking him in excitement

“Point?”

“Point is, I never met a random person in real life that knew about MBTI. That was awesome, Levi.”  They explained and quickly drank up their Fanta so they could continue. “You should totally read about it. I’ve sent you some links on Messenger. Did you check them out?”

“I skimmed through a few articles but like I told you, I don’t give a fuck.” Levi shrugged off. He had noticed people creating  a whole philosophy around it, narrowing every aspect of life to those sixteen types and their functions.

“But it’s so interesting!” they insisted. “How can you not be at least a bit entertained?”

“My definition of fun differs from yours, Hanji, in case you didn’t notice.” 

They sighed loudly in annoyance.

“But I still can talk to you about, right?” they asked not waiting for an answer. “You see, learning about MBTI could help you learn a bit or two about yourself. Your weakest points, how to develop your auxiliary and tertiary functions, support your personal growth. You could even use it to work out people’s character you have to deal with it. It comes in handy, when you have to get something done. I mean, how cool is that?!” they continued their chatter, gesticulating enthusiastically leaning forward as if Levi couldn’t hear them.

He felt his mouth turning upward without his consent at this absolute gibbering. Hanji might have annoyed him to bones but they were his friend nevertheless and while he wasn’t going to admit it to them, he did enjoy their classic enthusiasm.

Hanji’s talk was interrupted by the incoming text on Levi’s phone.  He unlocked the screen and embarrassingly, he felt his heart skip a beat.

_“Did u know that u inspired me to study on my own??”_

And another one.

_“Thanks a lot, my tutor :D”_

My tutor.

Forget about the grave, time to think about a right place at the cemetery.


	2. ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tutoring continues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You ask and you shall receive.  
> Also, let's count how many cliche tropes I can put into this fanfic before anyone notices?  
> I am sorry part two.  
> I kind of like it, I kind of don't.  
> Feedback, please? :

Levi was pondering over a bowl of cereals when a Facebook notification startled him. He pulled out a phone out of his pocket to check what it was.  A game invitation from Hanji, obviously. At this point, he had started wondering whether they were doing this on purpose. Most likely, since they knew how much it annoyed him. Levi rolled his eyes, putting the phone away. He ate up his breakfast quickly and got up to finish his morning activities. He liked to indulge himself in reading books while drinking tea in bed but today he didn’t have much time to spoil himself. He needed to visit Erwin to give him his notes before his physics course.  Erwin had a pretty bad case of cold which was predictable due to a current season. It was freezing, even for October.  Levi could always take photos of his notes and send it to him without leaving the house, yes, but Erwin was his friend nevertheless and despite what some people might have thought of Levi, he did care for his friends. He was a man of action so he liked to express his feelings by doing things.

So within forty minutes he found himself at Erwin’s place. He gave him his notes, checking up on his friend. He was obviously given a teasing comment about his caring but he knew that Erwin appreciated it so he ignored it. Leaving Erwin’s home he headed toward the nearest bus station to get to the uni. He wanted to mull over his notes again before test. He found commuting a perfect time to study because he never knew what to do with himself at public transport. It gave him something to be busy with. 

A few people were already standing at the bus stop indicating that the bus was arriving shortly.  He chose to stand at the certain distance away from people, avoiding a potential conversation with a stranger. That was when he heard someone calling his name.

Someone.

Levi felt his heart automatically rate faster. He turned around to find the source of the sound.

That someone was walking over to him making Levi’s knees go weak with their smile.

“Hey Eren.”

“Hi. I knew it was you as soon as I saw you.  You’re quite easy to spot with your height and all.” Eren gave him a teasing remark but Levi couldn’t bring himself to care.

“Shut up.” He replied anyway.

Levi cleared his throat checking if the bus was arriving. “You’re going to uni?” he asked.

“Yeah, journalism course. At 8am.” He cringed, his nose wrinkling in a funny way. “You?”

“Physics.”

“Cool, then we can go together.”

Yes, cool, wonderful. 

“I suppose, yeah.”

Fortunately an approaching bus saved Levi and gave him a minute to gather his thoughts. Why did this kid seem to make him nervous all the time? It was getting annoying. He really needed to start behaving like a normal, mature person.

They sat at the back of the bus, Levi next to the window and Eren beside him. It left him feeling weirdly trapped.

“I seriously don’t understand why on Earth some classes start at 8am. It’s practically night.” He heard Eren trying to make a conversation. He felt a little guilty since he didn’t speak much and probably made Eren think he wasn’t enjoying his company.

“I don’t mind the hour. My brain works best in the morning, so. It’s hard to get up but once I do, I am super productive.” He replied looking at Eren’s hands. He had very nice hands.

“I’m the opposite.  My brain cannot function in the morning.” He shook his head in resignation.

“Only in the morning?” it was Levi’s time to tease.

Eren shot him a look but chuckled. “Okay, I had it coming.”

“You did.” He nodded looking out of a window. “So, when do you need my maths skills again?” he inquired trying to sound nonchalantly.

Eren pondered for a moment before answering. “Actually, is today okay?” he bit his lower lip, uncertain.

It took him off guard. He thought that Eren would want another weekend session. But yeah, today was okay. More than okay.

“It is. No problem.”

“Yay! Thanks.” He flashed him a smile. “My place or yours again?”

“Doesn’t matter, could be mine.” He definitely couldn’t afford his mental health to be around Eren at the boy’s house.

“Yours it is. I have to make it up to you somehow. “

“Bullshit. Don’t sweat it.”

“It’s your time after all and you definitely don’t have to be doing this.” Eren insisted. “I can cook you a dinner?” he offered.

 “You can cook?” he raised his eyebrows in surprise. Eren didn’t strike as someone who knew their way around the kitchen.

 “Well. I could learn.” He smiled sheepishly, looking almost apologetic.

“I am serious Eren, don’t worry.” He rolled his eyes. “I wouldn’t be doing this if I really didn’t have time.”

Bullshit. Of course he would be.

“Let me at least take you out for coffee? Or something.”

That caused him to lose all of his bravado he thought he had gathered. Levi averted his eyes from Eren, feeling the blood rushing to his face. What was happening? He felt his palms sweat. He didn’t know what to answer. He stole a quick glance at Eren. The boy wasn’t looking at him but at his knees. Was he embarrassed?

“O-okay.” He heard himself reply. “Let it be your way.”

Eren smiled at that, his cheeks slightly flushed.  “Thanks. At least it won’t feel like I’m using you."

“You’re not.” Levi insisted.

They stopped talking for a while. Levi was glad for the silence. He could calm himself down.  He would be lying if he said that what had just happened didn’t make him fuzzy inside and happy. Levi knew he had no reason to feel this way since Eren had stated himself it was just his way of showing gratitude. He probably didn’t want to feel selfish.

“I’ve never seen you on this bus before. Why were you here?” Eren asked him when the bus stopped at the traffic lights.

“I was at Erwin’s to give him something.” He explained.

“Ah, my block is just around the corner. I don’t have to wake up extra early to get to the stop. Thank god.” He sighed in relief.

“I usually go to the uni on foot but since I had to stop at Erwin’s first and he lives in an opposite direction, I had no other choice.” He noticed an elderly lady struggling with her bags in front of them. All of the seats were occupied. He stood up to give up his seat for her. She thanked him with a warm smile. Levi nodded, feeling a bit awkward.  Eren joined him.

He was standing close due to the lack of space and Levi felt like he couldn’t breathe. His eyes were at the height with Eren’s collarbones. They were beautifully visible, a perfect spot to leave kisses. 

_Stop._

He needed to stop, his thoughts started to wander to a dangerous area.

“Look at you, such a gentleman.” Eren chuckled, his eyes piercing through Levi.

“Shut up. “ he scoffed, feeling embarrassed not because of what he did but Eren’s gaze. “It was nothing, a mediocre bullshit.”

“No, I like it. You’re a good person.”  He said looking at something in the background.

Wow.  Where was air?

They got up at their fourth stop and treaded their way to the uni along the crowded pavement. They needed to separate since they had lectures in different buildings. Levi shifted from one foot to the other in a nervous manner.

“Alright, I have to go. Text me when you want to come over. I’m free after 4pm.” He said nibbling at his lower lip.

“Will do. Bye Levi!” Eren gave him a half-smile and left. 

Physics.

Right.

He sighed and headed towards the building where he had his class.

 

*** 

 

He and Hanji liked to grab their lunch in a small diner, not far from the university. So that was where he found himself after his engineering lecture. Levi usually chose pasta but Hanji has always picked something different. They said that they tended to get bored with their food if they ate too much of it.

“What are you getting?” he asked not bothering to look at the menu. It took ages for Hanji to actually pick something.

“This creamy mushroom soup seems to be answering my today’s needs but I am also craving pizza.” They said, studying their menu as if it was rocket science.

“Try pizza with mushrooms then.”

“On the other hand,  I think I’ll have chicken breasts. I haven’t eaten meat for so long.” They pinched at the bridge of their nose. “It’s hard, Levi. I want to eat everything.” They whined.

“Just pick something already. The waitress is coming.” He hurried them. He was getting really hungry.

In the end, they chose rice with vegetables because  that was the way Hanji was. They were finishing their meal when Hanji asked him what Levi’s plans were for tonight. He knew he wouldn’t get away with this so decided to spare himself and not lie.

“Eren’s coming so I could tutor him.” He answered taking a sip of his water.

“Eren? As in Eren Jaeger?” they asked, obviously surprised. “I’ve heard that he has some troubles with his maths course but I’ve never thought he would actually come to you.”

“Dunno why he chose me. “

“Awww, look at you making friends.” They gushed patting Levi’s hand in excitement. “Holy fuck, Levi, you’re blushing!”

“I am not.” He swapped his hands away, pink covering his cheeks stronger than ever.

“You know, you’re usually pale, so it looks like you’re having a heart attack.” They remarked. “Cut to the chase, why are you blushing? Is something going on?!” they screeched. “Does our little Levi like Eren?!!”

He looked around, afraid someone might have heard them.

“Goddammit, Hanji. If you don’t stop screaming, I will walk out and you’ll have to pay for me.” He warned them tightening grip on his glass. “I barely know the kid.”

“But you’re about to get to know him better.” They winked at Levi.

He raised his eyebrows. “You look ridiculous.”

“Don’t you go all passive-aggressive  on me, Levi. I know you best. “ Hanji rolled their eyes. “Soo..” they trailed off. “You like him?”

“I do not. You just made me feel awkward by your statement, is all.” He maintained eye contact with Hanji so they knew he wasn’t lying.

Technically.

They sighed in disappointment looking for their waitress. “For a moment I thought something interesting was happening in your life.”

“Excuse me?”

“A crush would be a nice change in your monotonous existence, my friend.” They explained.

“I do not crush.” He winced.

Technically.

“Fine, but don’t you dare think that I won’t keep an eye on you two” they smiled smugly.

Great.

 

***

 

Levi was making mac n’ cheese when his phone went off. He figured out it was Eren so he tried his best not the rush to his phone.  He stirred a few times in the pot before deciding it was sane of him to go and check the message.

 _Im nearby , is it ok if I came in like twenty minutes? –_ said the text.

He answered affirmatively mentally making a note to set an extra place at the table. He wondered for a moment whether it was appropriate to open a bottle of wine but he decided it would be weird and definitely didn’t fit mac n' cheese dinner style.  He settled for cider. The meal had been already made when he a heard a knock to his door. Braver than the last time, he went to open it.  Eren was standing at the threshold soaking wet. Levi didn’t notice it had been raining.

“You look like a dog.” He said because his social awkwardness had taken over him again.

“Hello to you too, Levi.” He said still managing to look like a goddamn ray of sunshine.

“Come in, I’ll get you a towel.”  Levi smirked.  “And some clothes too.” He added looking at the state of Eren’s clothes.

“Will they fit?” he smiled sheepishly.  Levi knew he didn’t mean to sound rude.

“I have some oversized clothes, don’t worry.”  Levi headed towards his bedroom. “Make yourself at home. And please take off your shoes.”

He took out his grey loose sweats and Red Hot Chilli Peppers hoodie he had bought in his high-school time.  He hoped it was big enough.

He went back to Eren and found him standing in the exact spot where he had left him.

“I didn’t want to ruin the coach.” He explained.

“Alright. Here you go.” He handed him his old clothes and waved at  Eren to follow him to the bathroom. Giving him a fresh towel he told him to hurry because the dinner was getting cold. He ignored Eren’s “but you didn’t have to!” protest and walked to his living room.

Eren walked out after two minutes. Levi has never thought that seeing Eren wearing his clothes could make him feel all fuzzy inside but apparently he was wrong.  His heart hammered and one stupid thought occupied his mind. He wanted to see him wearing it all the time. The hoodie was just his size.  The pants looked a bit tight but not uncomfortably tight. He cleared his throat trying to suppress  all of those feelings.

“I put my clothes in the dryer” Eren said rubbing the back of his head. He took a seat next to Levi. “Thank you for the clothes.  They smell nice.”

“Shut up and eat.”  His hand trembled embarrassingly almost causing him to spill everything. “I didn’t make it just for you, for your information. I just happened to be cooking when you texted me.  Not everything resolves around you, Eren.” He tried to smile being thankful for his ability to use sarcasm whenever he needed saving.

“Pfft, alright. But thanks again. “

They continued to eat in silence, both obviously hungry.  

Eren finished his plate first, patting his stomach. “That was something. Thank you for the millionth time, Levi. I guess we’ll have to switch this coffee thing to dinner, won’t we?” he asked holding in his breath.

Good thing Levi swallowed what he had had in his mouth before otherwise he would have probably choked.

“C-could be a dinner, could be a coffee. Doesn’t make any difference to me.” He replied bravely looking over at Eren.

“Dinner it is.” The smile that Levi received would be the death of him. He took a large sip of his cider as if trying to wash down all of his feelings with alcohol.

After dinner Levi tutored him just like they had agreed.  Eren struggled a bit harder than the last time because this set of problems was more difficult. Nevertheless, they were finished and now sitting on Levi’s coach. During their tenth task Eren had asked him whether they could play video games again. And since Levi couldn’t bring himself to deny Eren anything, the answer was quite obvious.

 

 ***

 

“You meant video games as in general or just Uncharted 4?” he asked waiting for PlayStation to load.

“Uncharted 4. Duh.” Eren chuckled playing with the strings of Lev’s hoodie. “Do you listen to Red Hot Chilli Peppers?”

Levi shook his head. “Used to. When I was in high-school. I was a huge fan.”

“What kind of music do you listen to now then?”

“What is it? A job interview?” he smirked but answered anyway. “ Anything really, I don’t like to label myself. If it’s Mozart I like, then hell yeah, I’ll listen to it. Same goes for any kind of music.”

“I like this point of view.  I’m mostly into rap and dubstep. I know, weird mix.”  Eren said grabbing his pad.

“Okay, I’m taking it all back. I won’t listen to dubstep ever.”

“Come on, you probably just heard bad tracks. I will send you some links on Messenger, okay?” he offered.

“Sure.”

Why not.  Just kill Levi already.

It was 7pm when Eren decided he had to go home. He thanked Levi for everything again, smiling adorably at his older friend.

“You don’t have to wash those clothes. I will do it myself, don’t worry.  Just bring them to uni tomorrow.” Levi stated watching Eren putting his boots on.  It had stopped raining, thankfully. His partly dried clothes were in his backpack.

“Alright, I’ll just text you.” He nodded. “Bye Levi!” he opened the front door and left.

“Bye.” Levi said mostly to himself.

 ***

 

Levi way lying in his bed, reading Lord of the Rings when he heard his phone buzz with a notification. His heart skipped a beat when he saw it was Eren.  He clicked on the icon with Eren’s profile picture. The boy sent him a few dubstep tracks just like he promised to.

**Eren:**

**Hope you like it. :)**

 

He wondered for a moment how to reply. Was he supposed to reply?

 

**_Levi:_ **

**_Thanks.  Kids your age shouldn’t stay up this late, you know._ **

 

He decided to stick to his sarcastic self. Eren replied immediately since he was online.

 

**Eren:**

**Im not a kid**

**People YOUR AGE are usually asleep by now , old man**

****

**_Levi_ **

**_Careful, kiddo._ **

****

**_Eren:_ **

**Or what? :P**

 

_**Levi:** _

_**Or I won’t be tutoring you anymore.** _

 

**Eren:**

**LOL**

**Okay, Im sorry :((**

**I cannot fail**

 

Levi didn’t know how to answer to that so he put his phone away, disappointed how short their conversation was. After thirsty seconds his phone went off again.  He couldn’t help but smile at Eren’s message regardless of how basic it was.

 

**Eren:**

**So, what r u doing**

 

**_Levi:_ **

**_I’m in bed reading LOTR. And you?_ **

 

**Eren:**

**I love tolkien!! Same, i cant fall asleep and i have to get up early :(**

**My life sucks**

 

_**Levi:** _

_**Drink milk with honey.  Sometimes it helps.** _

 

**Eren:**

**Ill try. Thanks levi <3**

The heart emoji. Wow, he truly was damned. He stared at it for an embarrassing amount of time before replying.

With all due recept, fuck Tolkien. This was way more interesting.


	3. iii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the delay. Had to deal with some personal shit. Ahh, I can't tell if there's enough pining.

Levi knew that mornings in October were quite chilly and despite having put on his two layers of clothing, he was still shivering, pulling the sleeves of his sweater down. He should have gotten that bus pass a long time ago but he truly despised public transportation. It was disgusting, really, the stuffy smell lingering in every corner of a vehicle, as if it hadn’t been aired out in a long time. Did someone even take care of that? Not the mention the germs on the poles and straps that you had to hold on to so you wouldn’t  trip. And the suspiciously looking stains on the sits. Yeah, those were the worst.

He was out to do groceries before his lecture. It started at 11am so he had plenty of time to freeze his ass off outside.  He could always do that after his classes, true, but he had woken up pretty early and he didn’t like to waste his time doing meaningless stuff. 

Eren had texted him a few more times since their first conversation. Three, precisely. No that Levi was counting. A part of him wished Eren had failed his test so they could meet again. He mentally chided himself for those selfish thoughts but he decided that as long as he wasn’t doing anything about it, he wasn’t that bad of a person.  He was not sulking, he was merely… annoyed with the situation. Although they had only met twice, he involuntarily started to think of their meetings as a routine. And there was this one thing that Levi hated the most (besides dirt and unhygienic people) – breaking his beloved routine. He was a very organized person, taking pleasure in order and planning things. He should have seen it coming. So yeah, it wasn’t the _Eren thing_ per se.

It was weird to be thinking of Eren while putting the bag of tomatoes in his shopping cart. It was weird to be thinking of him while taking the receipt from the guy working at the retail. Hell, it was weird to be thinking about Eren, generally. But he couldn’t help himself and thought about him all the time. Well, not all the time but he was always there in the back of his head, like a goddamn fly that just wouldn’t leave you alone.  Not the prettiest metaphor to describe Eren but you get the idea.

He was leaving the store when his phone vibrated in the down vest’s pocket that Levi was wearing. He let out a deep breath in annoyance as he had to take his gloves off to operate on the screen. He stopped being mad when he saw who was texting him. The weather just got a bit better. It was downright hilarious and scary of Eren to text Levi when the said individual had been just thinking about him. Did Eren have some sixth sense?

The boy was asking him to meet later. That was weird, no question about tutoring. Levi had just started to get his hopes up until he received the second message. Apparently,  Eren had no one else to hang out with later. He scowled at the screen with disappointment. What was he counting on after all? It was not like Eren was his close friend. Or was he?

Levi licked his lips, remembering to start using a chapstick. He hated when his lips were chapped. He also tended to nibble at them whenever a stressful situation occurred. He would only realize he was doing this when he could taste the blood in his mouth. Cold weather was his nightmare because that was when he needed to take care of this problem the most.

He slowly typed out his response with fingers already numb from the chilly wind.  He could hang out, why the fuck not. Ignore his emotional stability. Or the lack of it. They agreed to meet at the café at the local mall near Levi around 5 o’clock. He could still study beforehand so it was good.

The lecture was boring; nothing surprising, really, but he still managed to jot down some notes. He loved good notes so he always rewrote when he got home. Levi remembered Hanji mentioning something about “studyblrs” and how his way of studying would make a quality studying blog. Also, something about notes.  He had never felt any inner desire to fill up the internet with his thoughts. He was a very private person, respecting his privacy especially on the web.  He decided to leave oversharing to Hanji.

Getting home he immediately headed for kitchen to start water for some tea. Tea was the best way to warm oneself up. After he had put his messenger bag next to the couch, he plopped on it. While he was waiting for water to boil he turned his laptop on idling his time away. He thoroughly inspected the keyboard checking whether it was in need of cleaning. Yes, he found his laptop also a tremendous source of germs, even though he was the only  who was using it.

When the electric kettle went off, he went to brew his tea. He took his tea black without sugar. No milk. He would always frown at people putting an unhealthy amount of sugar in their drink. They weren’t drinking tea. They were literally drinking sugar.

Having eaten his dinner a bit past 4pm, he decided to leave his house and head towards the mall. He decided not to wait at home since he didn’t have anything else to do. He could always do window-shopping. He actually didn’t mind doing it, it was the crowd at the malls that pissed him off.

Levi was just buying some newspapers to read later in the evening, five minutes to 5pm, when he heard his phone going off. Quickly paying for his purchase, he left the store and picked up.

“Yes?” he couldn’t help but felt his heart already beating faster

“Oh, hi, Levi, I was just about to hang up. I happen to be early, so yeah, I’m just letting you know I’m at the east entrance.” Eren said in one breath, his voice slightly muffled by the noise in the background.

“That’s not early. That’s called being on time.” Levi pointed out already heading to where Eren was.

He heard Eren let out a chuckle. “That’s early to me. Dude, appreciate it. I’m usually late!” the boy insisted.

“Alright, see ya.” Levi rolled his eyes and hanged up not waiting for Eren’s answer.

He took the escalators to come to the ground floor. He would’ve been lying if he had said that he wasn’t nervous. He so was.  He tried to walk nonchalantly, make his pace steady and slow but in the end he was rushing. To see Eren. Which was an embarrassing thing to admit, really.  When the east entrance appeared in his eyeshot he scanned the surroundings,  searching for a pair of those unique, big eyes.  Eren was leaning against the white pillar, doing something on his phone. He hadn’t noticed Levi yet. Levi walked over to him, clearing his throat before greeting the boy.

“Hey.” He said rubbing at the back of his black hair.

“Hi. What’s up?” Eren snapped his head up, putting the phone back in his pocket. 

“Uhm. Nothing much. You wanted to grab a coffee, right?” he felt the awkwardness taking over him.  He looked at the lights decorating the walls to avoid Eren’s gaze.

“Sure. Let’s go there.” Eren pointed his head in the direction where they supposed to find a café. They began walking, Levi being painfully aware of not knowing what to with himself.  Luckily, Eren wanted to babble, as usual.

“To be honest, I did have someone else to hang out with, you know.” Eren smiled at him, uncertain.

“Oh?” Levi didn’t know how to answer to that one. He winced at a loud family walking past them.  Jesus, they were in public.

“You’re not my last resort, Levi. “ Eren snickered. “I was just an excuse to drag your ass so I could buy you a coffe and later dinner. You wouldn’t have agreed if you had known what I had in mind.” He finished smiling sheepishly.

Levi flushed at the words against his will. “I suppose you’re right.” He admitted nodding his head.

The words “dinner” and “buying” combined together often meant only one thing.  Since it was impossible for this thing to be actually happening in this scenario, Levi felt quite uncomfortable hearing those words escaping Eren’s mouth.

“Why are you always quiet, Levi? You don’t like my company?” Eren inquired when they found a free spot at the café. It was in the back, hidden in the corner, perfect for a date. Not that Levi noticed that.

Eren would quite often say Levi’s name. He liked the way it rolled off his tongue. It got him, it really did. He briefly wondered how it would sound being moaned out. Suppressing those inappropriate thoughts away, he answered the question.

“I do like your company.” His throat was suddenly very dry. “I just sometimes don’t know what to say.” He shrugged off, a bit embarrassed.

Eren beamed at that. “I like yours too.” He said, his eyes never leaving Levi’s face.

Levi was tapping an indefinite rhythm on a wooden table, feeling Eren’s hot gaze on him.  He was saved by the waiter, coming up to take their order.

Levi went for a black tea, unsurprisingly. Eren ordered a coffee so complicated, with so much additional stuff that now it wasn’t quite certain whether the drink he had wanted, could be called coffee.

“What?” Eren shrugged noticing Levi’s judging face. “I like it sweet.”

Levi smiled against himself at that, deciding to help Eren ease the conversation. It wasn’t the boy’s fault that Levi was socially inept. Especially around Eren.

“How long have you and Armin known each other? Or is it just the flatmate thing?” the brunette inquired honestly curious. Eren and Armin were quite close. Alright, not quite. Like very close. And no, Levi was not jealous.

Eren lightened up at the mention of his flatmate. “We’ve been best friends basically since we were in our diapers. We were neighbours, went to high school together.  I’ve always thought that Armin would settle for some high-end uni, you know? Like Ivy League, or something.  He has so much potential, he’s super smart. “ he paused to take a deep breath. “ “But no, he chose to go here, to Trost. When I asked him why, he said that if he went to Harvard, he would lose himself. Whatever that means.” He shrugged.

Levi briefly wondered whether Eren himself was the reason Armin decided to go to a different university.

“So yeah, we went to uni together, now we’re living together. Some would think that we’d eventually wear each other out.” He chuckled. “I’m sure they meant me wearing Armin out, though.”

“Wow, you guys are truly best friends.” Bravo Levi, way to sound not bitter.

“Thanks?" Eren’s lips turned upward in an uncertain smile. “What about you and Hanji? Your friendship seems rather..” he trailed off to give Levi a knowing look. “No offense, but weird.”

“Yeah, tell me about it.” The brunette rolled his eyes. He looked around gathering his thoughts. “Unlike you and Armin, we’ve met here. Erwin introduced them to me. How we managed to stay friends, is beyond me. Perhaps, they keep giving me some sort of drug affecting my actions.”

To be honest, that would explain this weird… crush.

“Don’t get me wrong. You guys are great.”  Eren insisted, shaking his hands. “Weird but there is something similar between you too.”

“Wow, you asked me out just to offend me?” he scoffed pretending to be mad.

Levi mentally cringed at his poor choice of words but Eren seemed to be unaffected.

“Omg, you know what I meant.”

“No, I don’t.”

Eren wanted to keep on arguing but Levi  immediately changed the subject. He did not want to hear how he and Hanji were similar.

 

“How’s math?” he decided to test the waters.

Eren’s eyes widened as if he obviously just remembered something.  “Oh, I forgot to tell you. I aced my test this morning. All thanks to you, Levi.” The boy winked at him

He actually winked at him.

Save Levi’s poor soul.

“Fuck.” Shit, he said it out loud receiving a confused expression from Eren.  “Sorry, I bit my tongue. I mean, it’s awesome.”

“Oh, okay.” He paused for a second to clear his throat. “ We’re having this dinner later, you know.”

“You’re nothing if not persistent. “ Levi’s mouth twitched in amusement. “Fine.”

“Yay.” Eren raised his hands in victory. “It’s my charm.” He jokingly wiggled his eyebrows.

And Levi was not going to argue with that.

They fell into a comfortable silence this time. A minute later the waiter came up with their drinks.  The pair muttered out their “thank you’s” and started sipping  on their beverages.

The next question that fell out of Eren’s mouth nearly caused Levi to choke on his tea.

“Do you have a girlfriend?” He looked almost embarrassed but still kept his eyes on the brunette. “I mean, I’m just asking if you’re seeing anyone. I wasn’t implying anything. I mean, yeah, well… shit.  Sorry. I was genuinely curious about you, is all.” He finished taking a sip of his coffee to cover his blushing cheeks.

“Uhm, I do not.” Levi replied, sounding a bit dumbstruck. He hesitated on telling Eren that he wasn’t completely straight. He had settled for not doing that. What would have been the point of it, anyway? He knew that Eren wasn’t homophobic, but still.

“Oh. That’s cool.” He let out a deep breath in… relief? “I mean, not cool. I mean, fuck, you know what I meant.”

“Nope, but okay.” Levi was stirring his cup of tea aimlessly despite not having any sugar in it.  He observed the created whirlpool  with a mild interest. He felt awkward, again. The redness covering his cheeks wasn’t helping much.

Levi couldn’t stop himself and asked the question that had been bothering him for quite a long time.

“Are you single?”

“I am.”  Came the answer. Too quickly.

Alright, Levi had sworn he did his best not to get too excited at the received new. He failed miserably, though. At least his facial expression stayed as apathetic as ever.

A loud couple quarrelling beside them saved Levi from having a cardiac arrest. Now, he had something to complain about.

“I surely love taking my shit to public so everyone knew my relationship is such a shithole. “ he sarcastically remarked, taking a sip of his tea. He didn’t care if he had been heard.

Eren was still staring at them, obviously. The boy wasn’t exactly subtle.

“Geez. Are they going to kill each other?” he said quietly with a light smile averting his gaze to Levi.

“Who knows. I hope so, they’re kinda loud. “He shrugged.

“We would have to take part in a hearing as main witnesses.” The boy pointed out. “I gather you’re not exactly thrilled by this thought.”

“Hell no.  I take that back, I don’t want to waste my time because of someone’s drama.”

He felt Eren nudge his shin. This caused him to involuntarily shiver. “What?” he snapped, more annoyed by his body’s reaction.

“I think they heard us.” He whispered, trying to contain his laughter.

Levi didn’t feel like laughing. He was too taken aback by Eren’s wrinkles caused by the huge grin. The kid knew how to kill him. He was in possession of the greatest weapon ever. Perhaps Eren was the punishment for his sins. But then again, he wasn’t that bad of a man.

“To hell with them.” He gave his reply eventually.

That was when Eren’s phone went off. Levi watched the boy pull out his phone, unlocking the screen and reading the message. He looked so cute focusing on what he had in front of him.

Wait, what?

“Sorry, that’s my cousin, Mikasa. Wants to skype with me in the evening.” He explained typing out the answer. “Okay, done.” He tossed his phone on the wooden table.

“You two are close?” Levi had never heard of Mikasa before.

“We’re pretty close yeah, for relatives, I mean. She’s my other best friend.” Eren nodded playing with the cinnamon container.

“Since, you’re skyping, I assume she doesn’t live here?”

“Yes, she’s back in the Shingashina. She works at the bookstore. We only see each other occasionally, like for Christmas and such.”

Levi scratched his neck, as it had felt ticklish. “That’s understandable, given the distance. I assume you’re going home this Christmas, too, right?”

“Correct. What do you do usually for Christmas?”

“Nothing?”

Eren stared at him for a while, obviously shocked.

“What do you mean nothing?!”

“My parents are dead, remember?” he raised his eyebrows not understanding what the whole fuss was about.

“Yes but do you spend Christmas Eve alone? In your house? Watching tv? What the fuck, Levi?”

“That’s usually how it goes. Don’t worry Hanji and Erwin keep asking me to spend the holidays with one of them. I don’t know what the big deal is.

“It’s just not right!” He slammed his fits on the table, receiving a few concerned looks from people around them.

Levi didn’t know what to said so he gave a small shrug with his shoulders.

Eren licked his lips, obviously thinking hard about something.

“I know, we like barely know each other, but add me to the list.”

“List of what?”

“People inviting you for Christmas.”

Levi’s eyes widened at that, he felt a flush creeping up his neck.

“You can’t be…”

Now Eren was the one to be blushing hard. “Well, you’re kinda right. I’d have to ask my  mom first but I’m sure she would be fine. We have extra room. Look, you could see it as a repay for what you’ve done to help me.”

“I thought the dinner was the way of you repaying me?”

“Ahhh, so you’ve  finally accepted the dinner as the repay.” Eren smirked at him. “I’m serious, though. Give it a thought. It could be nice.”

Let’s be honest. Levi really wanted to say “yes” as soon as Eren had finished his sentence but he also wanted to remain sane. He was afraid that Eren was simply pitying on him. As much as the thought of spending such intimate holidays with the boy was alluring, he knew he couldn’t allow himself to get his hopes up. It would have defeated the purpose of him trying to get rid of those weird feelings consuming him.

“Alright, thanks, whatever, I’ll think about it.” He said not intending on thinking about it. Theoretically. He knew that he would be thinking about Eren’s offer non-stop from now on.

Eren beamed at his answer.

There went his sanity.


End file.
